Just the highlights of the past weekend when I played hookie...
With nothing in a bag but a toothbrush and a clean pair of drawers, I headed out of town to get the hell away from work, my inappreciative 6 bosses, and everything else that was frustrating and unpredictable in my life. Unfortunately there was one problem I couldn't escape from; I didn't have enough money to get that far. I was almost out of gas when I finally turned into Gina's driveway an hour later. I collapsed into her house, hardly talking to her, and fell asleep on her couch. It wasn't even 7:00 yet.
Lemon picked me up the next morning with her kids in tow. My friend Lemon is a bona fide MILF - no, make that a MMWF ("Men Would" instead of "I Would"). She's got two kids under three years old that are adorable, and she happens to still look fantastic. She insisted we were going someplace completely brainless, but it was a surprise. "Fine," I told her. "As long as it's cheap, too." A smile crossed my face as she drove us into the parking lot of Chuck E. Cheese.
We met up with two of her friends there, all MMWF's, all with kids under three. I spent the day eating pizza, drinking beer (yes, they sell beer at CEC, go fig), running around with three-year-olds playing cheap games with tokens, and generally turning my brain into mush. It was the best form of therapy ever.
Exhausted, Lemon let me stay at her house for the night, where she promised more brainless fun the next day. I couldn't wait.
Saturday: Lemon woke me up early. She packed up her kids and her husband and we all drove to a local park to watch her son play Tot Soccer. Now, if you've never seen Tot Soccer, it's something you really have to see to believe. Watching a bunch of three-year-olds running with their chubby little legs up and down a section of grass, not knowing where they're going or what they're doing...it's quite a sight.
The entire line of defense for the Red Team was picking grass and throwing sticks at each other. Half of the Blue Team was calling for Mommy, while the other half was sucking their thumbs. It was hysterical. Especially because - surrounded by parents who were taking this so seriously - I found myself screaming along with them for the three-year-olds to pass and score a goal. Amazingly enough, a couple times they did.
Gina picked me up at Lemon's and I spent the rest of the day at her house. I took advantage of her shower, wardrobe, refrigerator, and TiVo, and stayed indoors all day. My version of an expensive spa treatment. I stayed until it got dark, and then realized I had to face the real world again soon.
Driving home I looked back on the weekend; for more than three days I didn't have to think about anything. And that had felt good. Unfortunately, there comes a time when you have to get back to reality and start making decisions again. But I know I can make it through another week because of the memories of one of the greatest weekends ever. The weekend when I was a kid again.